Top 10 Dumb Blonde Jokes

Yes, the top 10 blonde jokes of all time!
(In reverse order - best last. Please read the Disclaimer.)


10 Question: If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first?
Answer: The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!


9 The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"


8 A blonde was walking down the road with a healthy looking pig under her arm. As she passed the bus stop, someone asked,

"Where did you get that?"
The pig replied,
"I won her in a raffle!"


7 A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket.

Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.

She showed him the instructions on the tin,

"For best results, put on two coats".


6 Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger.
First Blonde:

"I can't seem to get this door unlocked!
Second Blonde:
Well you better hurry up. It's starting to rain and the top is down!


5 Three blondes were walking through a field when they came across a set of tracks.

The first blonde looked down at the tracks and said,

"I think they could be bird tracks."

The second blonde went to look and said,

"No, I think these are deer tracks."

They stepped aside and the third blonde went over to the tracks. She looked down, then got run over by the train!


4 A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied,

"You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."


3 A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke. A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat. The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling,

"You dumb blonde bimbo! It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name! If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you!"


2 A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump.

Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said,

"I can't take this, you're my friend."
But the blonde insisted saying,
"No. A bet's a bet."

Then the redhead said

"Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money."

The blonde replied

"Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!"


1 A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette.

When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.

After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought,

"Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said,
"If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.

The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."

The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car.

Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said.

"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

Don't forget to link to blonde-jokes.co.uk on YOUR web site! Simply copy the chunk of html code below, and paste it into your most visited page.


<p><strong><a href="http://www.blonde-jokes.co.uk/">
Blonde Jokes</a></strong> - The funniest collection 
I have ever seen!  Do <B>not</B> miss it!</p>

Funny Pictures
Video Clips
Blonde Joke One-Liners
Funny Stuff
Recommended Funny Sites
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Funny Christmas Songs




    Reciprocal Links
    Blonde Jokes
    Cartoons
    Directories
    Fancy Dress
    Funny Pictures
    Funny Stuff
    Funny Video Clips
    Games
    Greetings Cards
    Joke Shops
    Jokes
    Merchant Accounts
    Novelties
    Other
    Practical Jokes
    Satire
    Screenmates
    Translation Software
    Weird

    Add URL

  • The Best Joke Book Ever

    Download the best joke book in the world. It took years to compile, but you can grab it in seconds!

    Click Here Now!

    Blonde Joke One-Liners
    other Funny Stuff
    Video Clips
    Funny Pictures
    Recommended Funny Sites
    Christmas Jokes
    Funny Christmas Songs



    Reciprocal Links

    Jokes Disclaimer: The characters in the above jokes are purely fictional, and are not intended to represent any individual either living or dead. Any resemblance is purely coincidental.
    The above is a blonde joke simply because it has to be a joke about someone. We hereby acknowledge that not all blondes are as silly as those above, and that many are in fact very intelligent.

    Copyright © 2000 - 2005 blonde-jokes.co.uk